Thanks and Reflection

Thanks for the Traditions

Thanksgiving is always a delicious affair. I bring a dish and the family receives my humble offerings with delicious mains, salads, desserts, and appetizing foods I have no idea how to track in my macros tracker. Homemade food is the most decedent, delicious, drool-worthy affair.

And the food coma is REAL folks. I knock after dinner every time. And, if you’re like me, you skip breakfast and lunch and save all that calorie loading for that dinner. Oooooo Mama!! Nothing tastes so good as the Thanksgiving dinner.

Tomorrow is a spot of shopping – okay, I’ve been shopping the past few days – but tomorrow/today, our family will complete our annual clothes shopping tradition. No, you will not see us in a mall or major chain store, in fact, we avoid such places during this shopping mania like the plague. No, we will be heading to a lovely store with the best variety where hardly any violence will occur aside from a toddler or two hauling down some hangers in a fit of impotent rage.

We go early in the morning and finish when most folks are devouring a rushed brunch. We spend the drive talking, catching up on our lives while apart -even though we talk/call each other every day. Oh how we laugh and chat and smile, the soul rejuvenated by the love from each other to one another.

Then spend time with friends: meeting, talking, eating, catching up on each other’s lives and updates after being so long and far apart. As adults we are spread across the country, so the few within range meet up and spend time together. I’m wondering if in the future we can skype our far away friends in -some of us have moved too far to visit. I imagine we will go to meet them sometime – if they can host, or we can host. We’ll see what we shall see.

Then spend time with friends: meeting, talking, eating, catching up on each other’s lives and updates after being so long and far apart. As adults we are spread across the country, so the few within range meet up and spend time together. I’m wondering if in the future we can Skype our far away friends in -some of us have moved too far to visit. I imagine we will go to meet them sometime – if they can host, or we can host. We’ll see what we shall see.

I am grateful for this opportunity to spend time with family and friends and engage in meaningful dialogue.

Reflection

For me, Thanksgiving harks as a period for reflection. I wake up this morning a few hours after midnight and find myself thinking about the past year, the past five years, and the present.

If I plotted my journey as a line graph or trend line, I think a year ago from today would have been the start of an uptick, a bend in the curve. Not immediately but gradually, I’ve turned things around. It took a lot of reflection on who I am as a person, who I want to be, and the gap between. Then identifying tools and strategies to help me close that gap and be the person I know I can be.

Today I am closer. It’s been a year of this new direction, and while I’ve whined a lot on this blog –LORD Have I whined!!– it was to a purpose.

Silence gives something power. At least, this is what I have come to believe. Holding it in, silent and stewing, brews a poison in the heart and soul. Talking it out, to yourself, to trusted friends and family, and to strangers helps. Gain perspective, purpose, and best practices for the future by talking and getting feedback/advice.

It is strange  how time changes things. Time and healing.

While I do not wish my bad experiences on anyone, least of all myself, it has helped me to grow because I was able to turn my pain into something positive and beautiful. The process was ugly; the outcome, astoundingly positive.

I went from ignoring my reflection and thinking badly of myself, to looking proudly every morning thinking how sexy and hot I look. That I’m beautiful – believing it and not just saying it!- and that I’m smart and capable. That I can be athletic and strong in body, that the gym isn’t a scary place to avoid, and that I can be and do all the things I set my mind to.

That I don’t have to be alone. That I have friends and family, and while they aren’t a hop and skip down the road, they are always with me, in my corner.

I am blessed.

Thanks for the lessons, no thanks for the negative experiences.

From the muck of the pond, a lotus blossoms.

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Coffee Break #2: Get ye to the Gym!

Gah, I’m shlepping my homemade hot cocoa into my mug. Nothing glamorous this time, you’re catching me in a messy and compact day with lots more still to do.

Continue reading Coffee Break #2: Get ye to the Gym!